Hiraeth - Hatake Kakashi Fanfiction
by hatakiri
Summary: The job of an ANBU is to protect from the shadows.
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter One**

_Hiraeth(n.) a homesickness for a home you can't return to, or never was._

 _ **T**_ he blade gleams under the lights of the locker room as Kakashi runs a towel over his katana. The outline of blood has disappeared but the faint scent remains even as he sheaths it. The room is quiet apart from the clank of gear, the shutting of lockers, and the quiet breaths of those around him. He doesn't look up from his work, staying silent as the operative next to him wraps her legs.

He rolls out his shoulders before strapping on his armor. His arms first, steel protecting the vulnerable bones underneath. They will be of little use against jutsus, but they will hold up against most blades. Next, his chest. It's heavier than he'd like- he's sure that he will move better without it but his higher ups insist on it.

Kakashi turns his head, glancing at the entrance. By now, shinobi have begun to line up in their groups. Those who will take the front, those who will create the core of the unit and those who will flank them. Voices have now joined the environment, with captains calling names off their rosters, followed by a crisp, _'Present, sir'._

There is tension in the atmosphere, the Hatake can feel it. Despite the ANBU being the most heartless of all, he finds it rather interesting that they are still plenty human. One needs to be human to feel fear. Even those who have served under the Hokage for an extended amount of time seem to feel the difference in tone.

He rises from the bench as his name is called, giving a nod to his commanding officer. He will join their ranks in a minute. He turns to look at his locker, his name written in fine kanji. Hatake Kakashi. Without another thought, he peels it off. He knows, _they_ know, that if the situation is as serious as it seems to be, they will not be coming back.

He rolls the paper into a ball, shoving it in his weapon's pouch before joining the ranks of those who have been rallied. Too many soldiers, all faceless and without identity. Slipping his mask over his face, he too becomes one of them.

They've gone over this a million times now, the plan, yet the Hatake still replays it in his head as they march. The village is asleep, the ANBU slipping through the shadows silently. The plan, yet he knows that it will not work.

They're going in blind, with limited information. Any positional tactic will be thrown off despite all their efforts if they don't know what they're up against. Yet it is believed that the ANBU possess a superiority in combat skill though Kakashi would not count on it. Iwagakure shinobi are strong, he has experienced it first hand.

With the Third Shinobi War ending just a few years prior, another one has started. It's among the shadows, quiet, unknown. The village shall not know, nor should those of any lower ranking than chuunin. With the Kyuubi attack happening just a number of years ago, the village is still recovering. No need to alarm the citizens when the matter had the possibility of being taken care of in the shadows.

That isn't what they really intend, Kakashi thinks silently as they approach the entrance of Konohagakure. An exit for them, perhaps the last memeory of Konoha most of them will ever have. He knows the sacrifice that is intended to take place- if you cannot beat the enemy, take them down with you.

"Hokage-sama." Kakashi breaks out of his group for a moment, gesturing that he intends to catch up. The old man looks upon him with his knowing eyes, filled with wisdom of a thousand lives. They meet the Hatake's singular one as the Copy Ninja reaches into his weapon's pouch. What he takes out sends a flash of surprise and recognition in the Third's gaze. It's a kunai, the one that Minato had given him for becoming a jounin. He holds it out to the Kage.

"For Naruto. When the time comes, will you make sure he receives it?" The Sandaime pauses, searching the silver haired shinobi's face. A nod is given.

"May Kami be with you." He says as Kakashi dips his head in a respectful bow before rejoining the soldiers. Dressed in black, they stream out the village gates as swiftly as a passing shadow. The Sandaime looks on with a heavy heart before glancing down at the kunai. He rolls it in his hands- it has been carefully taken care of over the years. For Naruto- the Kage hadn't seen the pair interact; the little blonde did not even know of the Copy Ninja's existence. Yet he has a feeling that Kakashi has been watching over the boy from afar- deep down, Hatake Kakashi possesses a heart of his own despite popular belief.

 _There is hope for him yet_ , Hiruzen thinks as the last of the ANBU depart. _Now all he can do is pray to Kami that he comes back._


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two**

 _ **H**_ _atake Kakashi._

The silver haired ninja flattens out the name tag, smoothing out the creases in thought. His dark eye flickers over each character, examining the fluid brushstrokes which form the kanji of his name.

A name is the binding element of an identity. Something for people to call you by, something that triggers certain emotions upon conjuring the thought. What will people remember Hatake Kakashi by? Fear for most, or perhaps even pity. Who didn't look down upon a boy who'd lost his father and family at a young age?

It is then that he decides that he would rather not be remembered at all. No longer did he want a cold chill to run down the spine of men when his name was uttered, or a sense of sorrow to trail behind each letter.

Without a moment to spare, he rips the paper down the middle. The two halves are rolled up in his fist before he lets the wind catch them in its drift. A name had no power over an individual if they did not let it. Silly ties to a past meant nothing now- he was simply another shinobi of Konoha who would lay down his life for the sake of the citizens to remain blissfully unaware.

"Hound." Kakashi looks up, a part of him scolding himself for being unable to detect the presence sooner. His single eyed gaze connects with the comrade that towers over him, letting him know that he has captured his attention, "Relax, I don't want anything."

He dims down the flicker of surprise that crosses his face when the Captain of his division takes a seat across from him. He watches as the individual crosses his legs, adjusting his position against the tree trunk in an attempt to make himself comfortable.

"It's fortunate that we've embarked on this journey before the winter rolls in," Kuroba Wataru, commander of Team Yon. A man in his mid thirties, short in stature. Quick, intelligent shinobi who's specialty laid with kenjutsu. Their squad will be guarding the flank.

"Perhaps."

There's silence between them following Kakashi's curt response. It's clear that the Copy Ninja is not one who would be considered talkative whilst he gazes down at his feet. The Hokage has modified their gear ever so slightly, providing closed toe boots instead.

"Why are you here?" Kakashi breaks through the silence with his monotone, the slight narrowing of his eye following it. "You haven't come before me to simply stare, have you?"

"You got me." Wataru smiles briefly, as if he were waiting for the Hatake to raise his voice. He pauses for a moment before reaching back slowly as if not to alarm the ANBU, retrieving a sheathed blade from his weapon's pouch along with a cloth. "I'm curious. What's your take on this situation?"

Kakashi doesn't answer right away, once again caught by surprise. Why he's asking _him_ is beyond comprehension, yet the man doesn't do anything without meaning. The silver haired man watches as the other unsheathes the blade, running the cloth over its fine edges.

A weapon suitable for a kenjutsu master, customized by the looks of it. The handle has the symbols of Konoha etched into it, while the blade is made of fine quality by the looks of it. He continues to stare, pursing his lips.

"I value your opinion." Wataru continues, never once looking up from his work. Perhaps it makes sense that he has chosen now to approach the Hatake, for after tonight, they would be deep into enemy territory.

What he's trying to ask is what Kakashi has already pieced together. The Hokage hasn't sent them off into war, but a suicide mission instead. A clash of forces to create equilibrium, to be killed and take the enemy along with you.

"There is nothing to be said." The silver haired nin speaks up, and in his words is a silent confirmation.

"Ah." They fall silent after that, the Captain getting the answer that he wished to hear. Or rather not hear, for perhaps he had come in hopes that the Copy Ninja would present a different perspective. Wataru sheaths the knife, tossing it towards the younger man who reflexively catches it within his palm. He stands, looking to make his departure for the night as he cuts him off before he can even speak, "Keep it. It's a gift."


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three

 ** _T_** he sun soon rises above the horizon to greet those beneath it. However, the ANBU have already begun moving, having set off before the first ray of sunlight could even flicker across the earth. They haven't got time to waste, not this time.

They're silent, stalking through the unfamiliar land with each step an equivalent to the weight of a feather. They've crossed into enemy territory- from here on, Iwagakure had the advantage. No longer would they be able to let their thoughts drift, lest they wish to suffer the consequences.

The sun shines through the leaves, small rays lighting the dark clad soldiers. Kakashi can feel the bits of warmth each time one passes over him. Though he has felt the warmth of the sun many times before, it is a different experience whilst he wears the armor of an ANBU. Too warm, too bright- there was nothing a shadow could do against the sunlight.

He lowers his gaze, keeping an attentive ear out for the slightest of odd noises. They've been traveling for some hours now, it would be too easy for ones attention to waver. The forest is familiar yet unfamiliar to him all the same. He must have crossed through this land a thousand times during the war, and yet years had passed since then. He preferred not to dwell on such things, for once he did, once he let himself feel-

He raises his head. The faintest flicker of chakra up ahead sends a chill down his spine. It's heavy, constricting. It surely isn't one he recognizes. The rest of his division have felt it too, and it is now that the space between the middle division and the flank division becomes apparent. The stop, the air suddenly tense.

"Taichou-"

It is then that the ground splits beneath those in front of them. They watch, frozen, as the first squad who take up the front of the army are shaken off their feet. The ground curls, reaching for them in animated motions. Piercing those above it, the few survivors are the ones who have managed to escape the grounds clutches at the expense of their comrades.

 ** _"_** ** _Get in formation-!"_**

He cannot hear the rest of the second division's captains orders before chaos ensues. Kakashi turns his head from side to side, searching. The jutsu had to be merely a distraction, so where-?

There.

They cannot hide from his sharingan. Just above them, sheltered in the trees are the Iwa shinobi. Unfamiliar masks cover their faces and it is then that Kakashi pauses.

Those aren't the masks of the Iwagakure ANBU.

He doesn't receive anymore time to think before they spring upon them. A shower of kunai rains over them, met with the clanking of blades as Konoha's ANBU retaliate. Kakashi deflects those aimed towards him with the edges of his blade, katana drawn from the moment he had sensed danger.

He keeps his feet on the ground with the help of chakra as the next wave of tremors goes through the earth, raising his blade just in time to meet his opponent's. In one fluid motion, he moves his own blade down his enemies, ducking down as the shinobi's weight distribution is thrown forwards. Using his free hand, he grabs one of the kunai which has decorated the forest floor, sending it through the man's back. Leaving the enemy behind, he moves onto the next.

They come in swarms, their aim to surely divide and conquer. With the first division disconnected with the second, and the second disconnected to the third, the communication between the army of Konoha nin is gone.

He slices through the crowd in front of him. Bodies fall limp, blood drips down his white mask. His heart beats swiftly against his chest, adrenaline coursing through his veins. He leans back, narrowly avoiding the sword of another before dodging the next strike which comes from his left. He thrusts his blade upward, piercing the man in front of him while he uses his own leg to sweep the other off his feet.

The ground shakes again, this time followed by the sounds of explosives. He staggers backwards and out of the corners of his eyes he spots the start of flames. Debris falls from above, flaming branches crushing soldiers beneath them. Kakashi squints his eyes, shielding his face as a katon and raiton jutsu collide nearby.

 _Those aren't the masks of the Iwagakure ANBU._ The single thought weighs on his mind as he leaps out of the way of a fuuton justu. Then, that meant that all the information that had been gathered prior to the mission was **incorrect**. _That meant-_ _ **Who exactly were they up against?**_

He tosses his bloodied sword aside, his hands flying through seals. By the time his feet meet the ground, lightning sparks across his finger tips. And he is off from the split second he touches the ground, racing through the battlefield.

The cries of a thousand birds fill the forest as his hands pierce heart by heart, chest by chest. Through his eyes he sees red- the splatter of each victims blood which blinds him for a split second each. He swallows, yanking his hand out of the sixth life he has taken in just a matter of seconds.

A grunt escapes his lips as he is thrown backwards. He hits the ground hard, rolling out of the way of the axe that pierces the spot where his head had occupied earlier. Looking up, he kicks out his legs, pushing the shinobi backwards. As soon as he is on his feet, the enemy strikes with great speed, sending the Hatake sliding backwards. He digs in his heels, hands forming quick seals.

A whistle sounds. The enemy nin abandon their fighting, clearly disciplined by the whistle.

Kakashi finishes the last seal before he takes a breath and blows. The air in front of him flickers to life, flames engulfing the area in front of him. He cannot see anything through the flames, the heat searing at the ends of his hair.

The flames flicker out, steam rolling across his line of vision. He narrows his eyes, glancing around through the smoke. They're gone, all of them. What they've left in their wake is a disjointed army of ANBU. The dead and injured litter the forest floor, the scent of scorched flesh reaching his nostrils. He searches the clearing, his breaths heavy as he recovers.

Still, the single eerie thought echoes through his mind.

 _Those aren't the masks of the Iwagakure ANBU_.


End file.
